Translation Fails: WeChat Edition

Language is one of the most interesting, beautifully complicated things that everyone in the world has the opportunity to experience.  Culture, language, understanding of self, and time are inextricably connected, and in order to really learn another language one basically has to completely change the way he thinks about himself, others, and the world.

But languages are hard to learn (unless you've got some kind of crazy language-learning gift, which I'm totally not jealous of except I am), and usually it's just easier to go to a dictionary or the internet for a quick, direct translation from some other random language to your own.  They're handy, they're quick, and they're not usually very accurate, which can result in anything from frustrating communication breakdown to mass hilarity.

Today's post is hopefully the latter.

Most people already know how hilariously inaccurate Google Translate is sometimes (check out Malinda Kathleen Reese's YouTube channel if you want some great GT related laughs involving your favorite songs), but Google isn't the only one who needs some help in the translation department.  WeChat - China's quintessential social media platform - utilizes Microsoft Translator, which has given me quite a few laughs and a lot of confusion whenever I use it to translate my Chinese friends' Mandarin posts.

Let's take a look at some of my favorites, shall we?



 

Your younger sister is a foot?  Or when you have a younger sister you get all the feet?  Or your younger sister's foot is hoping I have a nice weekend?  Either way, I'm confused...



 

Well, I guess she thinks the Prince from the live action Beauty and the Beast is, like, a ton hotter as a Human than as a beast.  That's good, I guess.




Okay, now you just done messed up, Microsoft.  Even I with my limited knowledge of Chinese characters can recognize the word for "food."  Check your dictionary, bro.




Everyone should know how independent what?  You are?  Your mom is?  I need it spelled out 'cause I only know, like, twenty or thirty characters.  That's why I (unfortunately) need this (equally unfortunate) translator.




What's how high?  Why does something that's high up require you to tiptoe out?  I do not understand, Microsoft!  Why am I relying on you like this?!



Well, I'm glad you and your sister can write so well that you're basically your own industry.  #SiblingGoals! 




What is "it" that A desires?  Or is "it" something you desire?  The picture doesn't help anyway 'cause it's just a vague photo of your friend who I totally don't know...



Which people?  What kind of people?  Why don't they communicate with you?  Because they physically can't, or because you don't like them?



I feel like I kinda understand what this means, but just the last part.  The first line and a half makes no sense in English.  I guess she's talking about how she and her boyfriend are gonna stay together for life?




Okay, so this one make a bit more sense.  They must be celebrating some five year relationship anniversary.  It's still suuuuuuuper awkward English.  There's no way you would get above a D if you turned this in for an English class assignment.




I guess it's good that the "double ugly girl" doesn't have any internal problems, but the pictures are totally of your face, not your gastrointestinal tract, and you're totally not ugly, jussayin'...




Whaaaaaaa...?




I don't...what?  Are you saying you don't like this person, or that you can't decide if you love or hate her so you're just not contacting her?




Oooooookay...


And my personal favorite: 


*throws a table*  *incoherent angry mumbling*  *slams a door 7.263 times*


And there you have it.  Some of the best (and most frustrating) Microsoft Chinese to English translation fails that have shown up on my WeChat feed.

I bet when I'm about 70 they'll have basically perfected online translators and jokes about Google Translate won't make sense anymore.  Until then, though, I'll just be sitting here, making faces at my WeChat feed and watching Google Translate Sings videos on YouTube.

What are some of your favorite translation fails from any language?  Have you ever had any fun fails trying to use online translators?

Soli Deo Gloria!

- Chrisi -

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